DwingDwang.com

You might remember hearing the news, back in March, that the folks marketing The Simpsons Movie
would be remaking some 7-11s across the country in the image of Apu
Nahasapeemapetilan’s beloved Kwik-E-Mart. As Simpsons devotees, we were
pretty excited.

Well, the D.C. area is among the lucky metropolises selected — but, to our dismay, the Associated Press (via NBC4) tells us
that the lucky 7-11 is in Bladensburg, Md. Of course Bladensburg isn’t
all that far from the city. Still, surely the nation’s capital deserves
something a bit more Metro-accessible. We were prepared to write the whole thing off — and to do so in song:

Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Now here’s the tricky part
Oh won’t you rhyme with me?
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
It’s already on Flickr-E-Mart
They’re in the sticks-E-Mart
It’s a marketing trick-E-Mart
The Kwik-E-Mart is really — d’oh!
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Not me!

But then we started to see the photographic evidence. There’s this Flickr set of the Kwik-E-Mart in Burbank, Ca. Between the Frostillicus decal, the Krusty-Os and the relatively obscure donut-topping reference, it’s clear that this is both a crass marketing exercise and a labor of love.

Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart? We doooooooo… More photos after the jump.

Photos by Sommer Mathis

Buzz! Cola!

This Kwik-E-Mart employee gamely posed with Apu for DCist.

The Kwik-E-Mart in Bladensburg is located at 4199 Kenilworth Ave, Bladensburg, MD 20710.

Guess we have to go back.

My very own Squishee, now home to drink and enjoy. The clerk who rang me up was wearing a name tag that read “Jacques Strap.”